Thing One and Thing Two Update - part 1

Last week within the hour of losing my job, DS2 received his State appointed Early Intervention Assessment.  Yesterday, I attended DS1’s first preschool parent/teacher conference.  So what order to present?

Today that was an issue, what order, how to juggle two, as I had DS1 sick on the couch and DS2 screaming, literally screaming for attention as I was trying to see if DS1 needed the bucket for throwing up.  I do love them both, but they both make it hard some times.  And reasoning with either child, yes they are both under the age of four, is next to impossible.  Then they both surprise me and make me think I’m the asshole in the equation.  Yeah, mommie guilt.

So, Thing One.

On Sunday this last week we went to a birthday party for one of his friends.  It was at a ceramic/arts craft place.  A pretty cool party over all.  What amazed me was his ability to follow instructions, wait patiently and participate.  I would estimate that six month ago I was worried that he seemed to only learn by watching, but now he could clearly listen and follow instructions.  He is still a suck-up; totally sits near the leader/teacher of the activities.  Or maybe he's used to this due to how we work in the kitchen together. But what surprised me was his participation.  He used to watch everything and do only 30-50% of the activities.  But he was with it all, 100%.  Even at the dance time, he was totally busting moves I’d never seen before.  I will post the video as soon as I figure out how to do that.  There was even a game, which he didn’t seem particularly into, but he did it anyway.

Then at the parent/teacher meeting the teachers confirmed my suspicions, the kid is growing up.  He is helpful in the class, nice to his friends and all the other kids as well.  He is now participating in activities, which at the beginning of the school year he wasn’t.  He rotates through all the class activities and doesn’t seem to avoid anything.  He is showing a good attention span.  Most important to DH, he is now counting to 5, without skipping four.

Here’s the amazing part, his teacher brought up that in the infamous “theater movement” class and music time, he is showing a lot of new moves that have really surprised them.  Well, that’s two of us! DH thinks its the Latin blood showing. He dresses himself – i.e., puts his jacket for terrace time, and buttons his pants after going “pee”.  These last items are great, but why then does he insist I do it at home?  Also you don’t know it until you are there, but just because the kid can poop in the potty doesn’t mean you are off the hook.  I have no idea for how long I’ll be wiping for him.

In NYC there is a lot of peer pressure to start kids in pre-school at age 2.  However, I chose to wait until he was 3.  Not that he was sitting at home doing nothing; the kid has a bigger social life than I ever have with ballet and Spanish classes.  But today, waiting until he was 3 to start the formal everyday school, feels like a good choice.

On the downside, DH thinks that I’m taking out all my frustration on the boys and asking too much from them, but DS1 particularly.  The weird part is, that I know I ask a lot from the boys, but I think I’m asking a ridiculous amount from DS2 more than DS1.  Maybe it’s the second time around guilt?  I feel guilty that the second child gets less attention, which makes me expect more from both so we can have more time doing fun things rather than routine activities.  Maybe I’m missing the point, the boys like doing the routine stuff, its only me feeling like it should be more.  Also the boys are so young that they will not actually remember any of our activities, so why do I try so hard.  But I can’t wait until they are older to have fun.  Yeah, mommie guilt is always there.  And frankly the boys do step up to almost every challenge I throw their  way.  Also, the really have DH wrapped around their little pinkies.

To be continued.