A Weekend Away

I don't know where to start! "It was the best of times, it was the worst of times" No, no, no, I'll save that for discussing politics - which I've been meaning to do an will get to in another post. It was great to get away. It was great to get to know extended family - really nice, lovely people. It was hard to leave the boys. It was good to leave the boys. It was hard to trust them in my parents' care. It was harder to trust them in my parents' care with each phone call home!!

Upon arrival at our first plane transfer, about 2 1/2 hours after leaving the boys, at touch down DH's phone beeps to say there is a message. I don't wait till we got to the gate, I called in taxi mode. Oh Fuck! What is wrong?! But when I called,  I find out that my Dad is having trouble figuring out how to get the sound on the TV.   Ok - not too bad, not bad at all. 

But then my mind starts working. My parents wanted to be with the boys, they complain about not seeing them and worried they won't know them.... but 2 hours into sitting he's trying to watch college football? Also, I don't allow the TV on during day light, so I know this action would prompt a question out of DS1. Afraid of how those were answered.  Also, I don't allow TV, only videos. Yeah, we are taking off on our second flight and I'm starting to wonder how my mom is going to handle both the boys all by herself.

Out of the next 3 calls home over the next 24 hours, twice my mom is napping while the boys are watching videos or playing with my dad. On the third call, my regular day sitter is there, which I had pre-arranged, but an hour beyond what I had scheduled, feeding the boys dinner. Ok, I admit, I'm glad she is there! When I talk to DS1, he informs me, they "are fooling around. Then going to have dinner, go to bed and fool around some more". Clearly he's picking up a few new phrases.

The wedding we attended was magnificent, beyond belief. But it was really the people we were there to see. Cousins, cousins, and cousins and my parents-in-law. It was great. DH's brother and wife were there, and we always enjoy hanging with them. However, DH had decided not to rent a car, to let his father drive, which I can assure you will not happen again!

Let me explain, we actually missed the wedding. We left 45 minutes early to a place supposedly 10 minutes away. We were all in the car, with two, yes, two separate GPS systems. But if you have the wrong address, it doesn't matter how many GPS systems you have!  After driving at least 35 minutes to a wedding supposedly 10 minutes away, we turned around. We called for help and were informed there were directions in the hotel gift bags, Aha!  Interestingly none of us had asked for the gift bags on check in. So, we had back to the hotel for the gift bag, yeah, we'll be a bit late.

As I'm gazing out the window, while my angry father-in-law drives 10 miles an hour down the freeway, I see our hotel go by! I inform the others. We laugh till we cry. 15 minutes later we reach the hotel, I go pee, check my tear stained makeup, grab the gift bag and off we go. 10 minutes into the drive my mother-in-law mentions that we are heading to the same area where the rehearsal dinner was the night before. I lean forward (yes, as dutiful wife I am in the backseat) and note that DH is reading the instructions to the rehearsal dinner site, not the wedding! More laughs, more tears, total family bonding, but the grim reality sets in that we have missed the wedding. Finally, at the wedding site, we pull up as the last bus for the reception is getting ready to leave. We flag it and jump on. 

The extended family, although we've been married for 10 years, I'm still just getting to know. This is the reason for the trip, and well worth it. Really just a great wave of people, all friendly and lovely, very welcoming although the years have passes since a tighter relationship existed. I really don't want to ascribe it to southern hospitality, these people are simply nice.

The next day was a post wedding brunch, lunch with cousins, and then our uneventful flight home. My house was tidy, the boys asleep, and my parents were tired and hungry. They want to sit again. They say they had fun. But I'm sure I'll hear the truth over the next few days as DS1 already told me that it would have been better if the lady grandpa had slept in his room and grandpa that snores could stay in my room.

Second time around

Two things on my mind tonight; first there are many things which I'm getting to enjoy the second time around that I've forgotten, and second,  I'm also going away this weekend for the first time and I'm nervous about leaving the boys.

When DS2 joined us, I was at first overwhelmed by we were "going backwards" to forgotten territory; diapers, snot, drool, etc.  But recently I've started enjoying a few things as I get to visit them the second time.  

For example, in the morning, DS2 wants me to put make up on him too.  When we head out, he wants lip gloss too.  When I come home he hugs my knees together with all his strength, that almost knocks me over.  I love that now he is blowing kisses, and I had forgotten how wonderful it is to have a kiss blown at you unexpectedly.  

The other day DS2 kept closing the closet door every time I opened it.  DS1 commented, "he's closing it again mommie".  I mentioned, "When you were small you liked to do that too; open and close all the doors".  DS1 was a bit fascinated that DS2 is not just a pet, but doing things he's done.  I want more kids, but recognize I'm unlikely to have any more babies in the house after these two.   For now, the second time around on the good stuff gets savored.  

As I said, this weekend I'm going away.  Just one night, but for the first time ever, out of town with DH and no kids.  I've traveled for work, even for a full 4 nights, but the kids were with DH.  I worry in this scenario, but about the basics not big stuff; i.e., did he feed them food or just snacks?  DH and  I have had a night without DS1; leaving him at home with a sitter while we spent a romantic night/morning in a great NYC hotel.  But we were just a few minutes away by cab.  

This time, we are heading out to a cousin's wedding, leaving early Saturday and returning Sunday night.  We are flying; not a quick cab ride away.  

Yeah, I'm a bit stressed about it.  The boys are staying home.  My parents are coming over.  My parents are in their 70s and want to show me they can do it.  The boys have met them on many occasions, so I'm not worried there.  But what if DS2 goes into melt down?  What if DS1 shows them what a full blown 4 year old temper is?  What if my folks fall asleep while the kids are awake?  DH says they will be fine, but I think he's just excited to get away.

Oddly the two thoughts go hand in hand.  Maybe the second time around on taking care of my kids will be good for my folks.  Maybe they'll get to remember how fun and oddly surprising every moment is.  Maybe the boys are in enough of a routine, the boys will behave - yeah I know hopeful thinking - I think they are more likely to try to get away with stuff; i.e., yeah, mom lets us watch videos when it is still day light - NOT!  Maybe its good for the grandparents to remember how hard it is for 36 hours straight.  Then they won't think I'm crazy.

I don't know, but I would rather take the boys with me and leave DH with the grandparents.  Not true, I would rather take DH to a hotel in the city and leave the boys with the folks, just a cab ride away.  The other option is to take the boys and my parents to the wedding and leave my parents in the hotel with the kids - yeah, that makes no sense at all, financially as well as hassle-wise.  So, I'm off.  The folks are in.  DH is happy.  And no fresh post from me this weekend.  Sigh, I'll be away.