Second time around

Two things on my mind tonight; first there are many things which I'm getting to enjoy the second time around that I've forgotten, and second,  I'm also going away this weekend for the first time and I'm nervous about leaving the boys.

When DS2 joined us, I was at first overwhelmed by we were "going backwards" to forgotten territory; diapers, snot, drool, etc.  But recently I've started enjoying a few things as I get to visit them the second time.  

For example, in the morning, DS2 wants me to put make up on him too.  When we head out, he wants lip gloss too.  When I come home he hugs my knees together with all his strength, that almost knocks me over.  I love that now he is blowing kisses, and I had forgotten how wonderful it is to have a kiss blown at you unexpectedly.  

The other day DS2 kept closing the closet door every time I opened it.  DS1 commented, "he's closing it again mommie".  I mentioned, "When you were small you liked to do that too; open and close all the doors".  DS1 was a bit fascinated that DS2 is not just a pet, but doing things he's done.  I want more kids, but recognize I'm unlikely to have any more babies in the house after these two.   For now, the second time around on the good stuff gets savored.  

As I said, this weekend I'm going away.  Just one night, but for the first time ever, out of town with DH and no kids.  I've traveled for work, even for a full 4 nights, but the kids were with DH.  I worry in this scenario, but about the basics not big stuff; i.e., did he feed them food or just snacks?  DH and  I have had a night without DS1; leaving him at home with a sitter while we spent a romantic night/morning in a great NYC hotel.  But we were just a few minutes away by cab.  

This time, we are heading out to a cousin's wedding, leaving early Saturday and returning Sunday night.  We are flying; not a quick cab ride away.  

Yeah, I'm a bit stressed about it.  The boys are staying home.  My parents are coming over.  My parents are in their 70s and want to show me they can do it.  The boys have met them on many occasions, so I'm not worried there.  But what if DS2 goes into melt down?  What if DS1 shows them what a full blown 4 year old temper is?  What if my folks fall asleep while the kids are awake?  DH says they will be fine, but I think he's just excited to get away.

Oddly the two thoughts go hand in hand.  Maybe the second time around on taking care of my kids will be good for my folks.  Maybe they'll get to remember how fun and oddly surprising every moment is.  Maybe the boys are in enough of a routine, the boys will behave - yeah I know hopeful thinking - I think they are more likely to try to get away with stuff; i.e., yeah, mom lets us watch videos when it is still day light - NOT!  Maybe its good for the grandparents to remember how hard it is for 36 hours straight.  Then they won't think I'm crazy.

I don't know, but I would rather take the boys with me and leave DH with the grandparents.  Not true, I would rather take DH to a hotel in the city and leave the boys with the folks, just a cab ride away.  The other option is to take the boys and my parents to the wedding and leave my parents in the hotel with the kids - yeah, that makes no sense at all, financially as well as hassle-wise.  So, I'm off.  The folks are in.  DH is happy.  And no fresh post from me this weekend.  Sigh, I'll be away.