The Evolution of Siblings

There has been a seismic shift in our household in the last two weeks.  I've almost been afraid to write about it but, today I'll share.

About two weeks ago DS2 finally figured out it is better to hand out in bed with DS1 then to have to go to bed in our room by himself.  The first time, I had put him to bed with DS1, but as usual he came walking out.  I told him, "Hey, you really want to sleep by yourself? You'll be alone, you'll cry and we'll all be sad."  He shook his head at me and then turned and walked back into the bedroom with DS1.  

Then he slept through the night.  

Since then, he goes in for the bedtime story, then lays down and hangs out till he falls asleep.   DS1 tends to fall asleep with in 10-15 minutes.  DS2 hangs out, pretty quietly, chills, doesn't get out of bed, but may not go to sleep for 25-30 minutes.  

This shift, took so much stress out of our lives.  First, I could let go of the guilt associated with making him cry until he fell asleep.  Then DS1 shifted his thoughts.  Some how DS2 moved from "pet" status, which included all sorts of comments to me, along the lines of, "what is my brother doing?", "what does my brother want", and "my brother doesn't like his cookies, can I eat them".  To "sibling" status. I first noticed it a couple nights ago in the bathtub.  I was giving the boys shaving foam with which to wash.   DS2 rubbed it on DS1's back, and DS1 asked, what is that.  I told him, he didn't mind and let DS2 continue.  After a few minutes, DS1 put cream on DS2.  True interaction.  The next night I came home from work and they were pretending to be in a boat together, with DS1 shouting instructions - i.e., lean this way, that way, row.  DS2 shouting back.  Then last night they were watching the 15 minutes of video before bedtime story.  DS2 had wandered down the couch and DS1 said, "hey, DS2 move down here so you can see  better".  

I know these examples may not seem like much, but it is so tangible.  It has changed how we all function.  There is a new understanding between them.  Even without DS2 speaking.  There is less tension at bed time, and this is huge for DH as well. I'm worried about his lack of speech, DS2 that is, and he continues to impress me with his maturity.  

Photo note: thought you'd like this one of our bike ride last weekend when both boys fell asleep in the wagon.  It's not happened before.  Usually they stay awake chatting and looking at stuff,  But this time we wore them out.