My dirty little cooking secret.

Just like every other mother on the planet that has walked through a grocery store, I see the headlines. We are a fat nation. We are a fat nation getting fatter. And I think, “not on my watch, not my family!” I know a polyester-saturated fat is a no-no (along with polyester wearing in general). I've read up on grass-feed vs. grain-feed animals. I want to be human to our four legged friends. I don’t need any more corn in our diet than that we can bite off a cob.

I am convinced I can to feed my family "healthy" food, in portions that wouldn't stuff an elephant. Believing that if I keep the changes subtle and don’t actually tell them of the mission I’ve accepted, it might work! However, once in the trenches, it is harder than I expected. With two toddlers and a husband that believes every meal should be worthy of a Michelin star, there are a few restrictions on what my family will actually eat.

Basically nothing green should be on their plate. Thinking I might be able to desensitize the boys, I started with food coloring. I explained that there is kitchen magic, showed them the bottles, and we ate rainbow-colored eggs for breakfast for a week (yes, inspired by 'green' eggs and ham). However, it turns out my boys have a great instinct about when it is food coloring and when it could actually be an item that is intrinsically green. Instead of not sounding an alarm when a green “thing” is on their plate, I ended up staining our dish towels, which really makes me wonder how healthy is the food coloring?

I pureed vegetables so there would be no chance of, "mommy, pick it out." But that too failed, leading to all my food presentations becoming suspect for a time. And, I think we are all happy not to have a baby food for dinner.

The general idea of ‘whole grain’ is lost on my family. The boys don’t like seeds or nuts in their food. Picking off sesame seeds of a bun tries my patience. And after telling the sunflower seeds were mouse turds –in a moment of mommy insanity where I thought it might appeal to their gross side– they won’t touch them. Let alone show any interest in bread that "looks dirty".

But these comments, this ridiculous snobbery, it doesn't faze me. I march on. I'm on a mission to make us all healthier as long as I'm still the meal planner, the grocery shopper, lead provider of food for this household. I bought smaller plates to make the portions look bigger. This worked; no one noticed. YEAH! I've included the boys in the cooking so they'll have greater interest in tasting their creations. This kind of worked; at least they are touching vegetables.

Then I discovered vegetarian cooking.

If you want to find great ways to spice up veggies, then vegetarian cookbooks it is! This is not your Betty Crocker overly sauteed limp no longer white cauliflower. This is Indian spices, amazing flavors that jump on the tongue and slow cooked veggie soups that scent the air. This is meatless meatballs, meatloaf and hamburgers that are actually tasty if you slather on BBQ sauce to hide evidence of vegetable involvement.

Now having moved into vegetarian cookbooks for 'healthier' choices and not to actually become a vegetarian... I found... on a dark cold night when I wanted to use up left over chicken fingers in the fridge... and after a glass of wine because I needed it… if you want really great tasting healthy meals... this is so ghoulish, but it even kept my husband from complaining... go ahead, add the meat.

I may be sinning against the great vegetarian cookbook rules, I may be banned from all vegetarians outlets from here hence forward, but I tell you, add the meat. The kids loved the new flavors. My husband was surprised at having new tasty choices on the table. And I just didn’t think it was respectful to let all the shrimp, chicken and ground beef in the freezer go to waste.